It's a new year, and another go at meetings.
I am kicking myself for the past mistakes, which is ok, b/c I accept them as what I needed to do, to get here.
And here, is the lightbulb moment.
The aha.
The holy shit I really must finish this journey, this part of the journey, to get to where I need/want/crave to be.
Rejoined meetings yesterday. The only thing that works for me, is meetings. That is crystal clear to me.
I have a friend who needs to lose 15lbs, and her and I joined together. This is the first time I wasn't jealous or feeling annoyed that I was joining with someone who had so little to lose. She loves me for me, and is a great friend....and she feels as much conflict about those 15lbs as I do about my 50lbs.
I'm starting therapy/counselling next month. I know I need to fix ME, I need to put back together who I am, who I was. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. My well being is in jeopardy, and that's not right.

I have an amazing family, my kids , Joe, but it's not all going to remain that way, if I don't take the steps to my healing. It's MY responsibility.

I'm going to work VERY hard to blog daily. It may seem a lot of rambling, and I don't even expect anyone to read this. But it's important to me to blog, and record all my work. Very important.

I read many blogs (read Shaunna's for every step of the way, followed Dee's, and many other's), and this I can see, is a huge part of success.

And away we go........